Brooklyn Bridge To Add Bike Lane Toll

$5 per wobble

According to reports, the Brooklyn Bridge bike lane will soon feature a toll: $5 per pedal wobble. City officials insist the money will go toward “bridge beautification,” which apparently means painting murals of pigeons holding MetroCards. Cyclists are furious, while pedestrians cheer at the thought of fewer Lycra warriors buzzing past like caffeinated bees.

The toll will be collected by retired Citi Bike employees wielding clipboards. Each cyclist must also declare whether they identify as “serious commuter,” “Instagram content creator,” or “tourist disaster.” “Finally, I’ll be able to ride without dodging tourists filming TikToks on Lime scooters,” said one grumpy commuter. But tourists don’t mind: “It’s cheaper than Broadway and just as terrifying.”

Upgrade options include the “Fast Lane” ($20) where you can pedal without stopping for pigeons, and the “VIP Package” ($50) which comes with a gondolier serenading you in Italian. Failure to pay the toll will result in a squad of pigeons pecking your helmet until you cough up cash.

TikTok’s #TollCycle trend shows riders dramatically handing over quarters mid-pedal, influencers treating the toll booth as a photo-op, and a viral clip of a unicyclist demanding diplomatic immunity. Meanwhile, bike messengers plan to stage a protest by circling the bridge in an infinite loop, demanding “one free wobble per commute.”

Tabloids had fun. The Post wrote: “PEDAL TO THE PAY.” The Daily News countered: “CHAIN REACTION.”

Mayor Adams defended it: “The bridge is iconic; it should be profitable too.” Governor Hochul muttered: “If Staten Island Ferry starts charging per sigh, I’m banning boats.”

SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/brooklyn-bridge-to-add-bike-lane-toll/

SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/brooklyn-bridge-to-add-bike-lane-toll/.

By: Annika Steinmann.

Annika Steinmann, journalist at bohiney.com -- Brooklyn Bridge To Add Bike Lane Toll
Annika Steinmann, journalist.

The post Brooklyn Bridge To Add Bike Lane Toll appeared first on SpinTaxi Magazine.



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