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Trump Announces New External Revenue Service

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Trump Announces New External Revenue Service: The Art of the (Tax) Deal “Why tax Americans when you can tax everyone else?” says Trump. Experts remain stunned, comedians thrilled. In a move only Donald Trump could pull off, the former president has announced the formation of an External Revenue Service (ERS), aimed at collecting taxes from foreign individuals, companies, and maybe even governments. His reasoning? “Why should hardworking Americans foot the bill when we can just bill the world? Believe me, it’s going to be huge.” The announcement left many scratching their heads, economists debating their life choices, and late-night comedians scrambling for pens. Let’s break this down—and laugh along the way. The ‘Global Tax Grab’ Explained Trump’s ERS would impose “America First” taxes on foreign entities for “using American stuff.” The plan is to charge global corporations for American technology , culture, and even the English language . Yes, you read that right—if yo...
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Hamas Extremist’s Guide to Living Your Best (last days) Life in Rafah’s Tunnels

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Hamas’ Luxury Diet with U.N. P ackages How to Embrace Your Inner Terrorist with Style and Panache While Waiting for the Inevitable Welcome, valiant terrorists of the shadows, to the ultimate self-help guide tailored specifically for you—the discerning terrorist holed up in Rafah’s luxurious subterranean abodes. Why wait for your dramatic finale in squalor when you can do so with flair and a dash of existential joy? Here’s how to elevate your final days from mundane to magnificent, because if you’re going to wait for the end, you might as well do it in style! Culinary Delights: Fine Dining Below Rafah UN-Aided Gourmet: Hamas’ Top 5 Culinary Adaptations with Stolen UN Aid Packages Bohiney.com Photo — A scene set in an underground tunnel where a fat, bearded Hamas terrorist is living luxuriously. He’s in a spacious, well-adapted underground… In news that might make even the most seasoned chefs do a double-take, Hamas has decided not to let their purloined UN aid packages go to w...
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Barack Obama Forced Back to Michelle

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Barack Obama Forced Back to Michelle: Public Backlash, Marxist Allegiances, and 127 Rendezvous with Jennifer Aniston The Return of Barack: A Romance Fit for a Hallmark Movie Barack Obama , once a symbol of hope, change, and well-ironed dad jeans, has found himself at the center of a public drama so scandalous it makes The Bachelor look like wholesome family programming. After a whirlwind of rumors that he engaged in exactly 127 secret rendezvous with none other than Jennifer Aniston, public pressure grew so fierce that Barack had no choice but to go back home to Michelle. Yes, dear readers, Barack is now America’s most reluctant rom-com protagonist . Forget Sleepless in Seattle —this is Restless in D.C. It all started with a leaked text thread (allegedly titled Obama & Aniston: Friends Forever ) that went viral faster than a TikTok dance challenge. Barack’s every move was scrutinized. Some called him a Marxist revolutionary , others a romantic legend , but almost everyon...
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Midwestern State Redesigns NASA Spacesuits…

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MSU Students Think Outside the Box and Redesign NASA Spacesuits… with Velcro and Hopes How MSU Plans to Make NASA More Stylish and Functional (Mostly Stylish) Move over Elon Musk and NASA’s design team— Midwestern State University (MSU) students are bringing their “out-of-the-box” thinking to the cosmos with the next generation of NASA spacesuit concepts. Spoiler alert: it involves duct tape, Velcro, and maybe a little bit of glitter for cosmic flair. When MSU announced its team was participating in the NASA SUITS challenge ( Spacesuit User Interface Technologies for Students ), the campus was buzzing. “We’re not just designing a spacesuit; we’re redefining the human experience in space,” said team leader Sarah “Techie” Thompson, who also made it clear that redefining the human experience means adding pockets—lots of them. The MSU Design Philosophy: Space Meets Pinterest DIY If you’ve ever wondered what would happen if a group of enthusiastic undergrads were tasked with r...
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