Brooklyn Rats Form Startup

Disrupt garbage collection

In a development shocking even by New York standards, reports confirm that Brooklyn’s rats have banded together to form a startup aimed at “disrupting the garbage collection industry.” Tired of waiting for delayed sanitation trucks, the rodents are promising “24/7 organic trash recycling, no human middlemen.”

The company, RatTech, already boasts Series A funding from a suspiciously cheese-shaped venture capital firm. Its CEO, a gray rat named Vinny, outlined the business plan at a press conference held inside a Bushwick dumpster. “Humans leave 12 million tons of food scraps every year. We’re just optimizing the supply chain,” Vinny squeaked before biting into a discarded slice.

New Yorkers are torn. Some praise the rats for their initiative, noting they’ve been quietly managing the city’s waste for decades. Others worry about worker safety, as RatTech employees are known to bite. Competitors in the waste management industry are furious, warning of “hostile takeovers” of garbage bags. One sanitation worker said, “I can’t compete with creatures that fit under locked lids.”

Tabloids went wild. “RAT STARTUP CHEWS MARKET SHARE” howled the Post. The Daily News countered with: “BROOKLYN CHEWS, CITY LOSES.” Social media erupted with memes of rats wearing Patagonia vests and pitching investors in WeWork conference rooms. TikTok trend #RatCoin showed users trading pizza crusts like cryptocurrency.

Mayor Adams, when asked if he supports the startup, said, “As long as they pay taxes, I’ll shake their paws.” Governor Hochul promised stricter rodent regulations but admitted the rats’ recycling rates were better than the city’s. Meanwhile, Staten Island rats announced they’re launching a rival company: Staten Scraps.

For now, RatTech is thriving. Their slogan, “One Rat’s Trash is Another Rat’s IPO,” already adorns tote bags in Williamsburg. Whether they’ll get acquired by Amazon remains unclear, but New Yorkers know one thing: you can’t kill hustle in this city, even if it has a tail.

SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/brooklyn-rats-form-startup/

SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/brooklyn-rats-form-startup/.

By: Annika Steinmann.

Annika Steinmann, journalist at bohiney.com -- Brooklyn Rats Form Startup
Annika Steinmann, journalist.

The post Brooklyn Rats Form Startup appeared first on SpinTaxi Magazine.



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