French Asshole Hit by a Bus

🗼 French Asshole Hit by a Bus After Refusing to Move for Wedding Photo at the Louvre PARIS, FRANCE - In a scene that could only be described as divine comedy, a Parisian man-dubbed by onlookers as "the epitome of French obstinance"-was struck by a city bus mere minutes after refusing to move for a couple's wedding photo shoot in front of the Louvre. Witnesses report that the man, who had been sitting on a bench with an air of indifference, ignored polite requests to shift slightly to allow the photographer, Christian O'Reilly, to capture the perfect shot of the newlyweds with the iconic Louvre Pyramid as a backdrop. 📸 The Incident Unfolds O'Reilly, a renowned wedding photographer, had meticulously planned the shoot, aiming to align the setting sun with the tip of the pyramid. However, the man's refusal to move disrupted the composition. Despite language barriers, O'Reilly attempted to communicate, but the man responded with a barrage of French, which O'Reilly described as "ranting." "I realized he didn't want to move, so I respected that and continued with the shoot," O'Reilly recounted. "However, he continued speaking loudly at me, so I calmly asked him not to speak to me as I was working." 🐦 Karma Takes Flight As the photo session concluded and the couple began to walk away, a pigeon-seemingly acting as an agent of poetic justice-defecated directly onto the man's head. Startled and attempting to clean himself, the man stepped off the curb and was promptly struck by an oncoming bus. Paramedics arrived swiftly, and while the man sustained minor injuries, his pride suffered a significant blow. 😂 Humorous Observations - The Unmoved Mover: He sat so still, philosophers are debating if he was the embodiment of Aristotle's concept. - Bench Pressed: Refusing to move from a bench? That's taking public seating to a whole new level. - Pigeon Precision: That bird had better aim than most archers. - Bus-ted: Talk about being thrown under the bus-literally. - Fashion Statement: Nothing says "Parisian chic" like pigeon droppings. - Silent Treatment: Ignoring requests is one thing; ignoring a bus is another. - Photo Bomb: He wanted to be in the picture; now he's the main subject of a viral video. - Language Barrier: Proof that rudeness transcends language. - Public Space, Private Ego: He claimed his right to the bench; the bus claimed its right of way. - Instant Karma: Faster than a Parisian espresso shot. - Artistic Irony: At the Louvre, where art imitates life, life decided to imitate slapstick comedy. - Tourist Attraction: Future visitors might come looking for the "Pigeon Avenger." - Bench Mark: Setting new standards for public obstinance. - Street Performance: Unintentional, but captivating. - Urban Legend: The tale of the man, the pigeon, and the bus will be told for generations. 🎤 Comedian Takes - Jerry Seinfeld: "What's the deal with people refusing to move? It's a bench, not a throne!" - Ron White: "You can't fix stupid, but sometimes a bus can make a dent." - Sarah Silverman: "He wanted to be part of the couple's memories; now he's unforgettable." - Larry David: "This is why I avoid public places. Too many variables." - Amy Schumer: "He got hit by a bus? Talk about a crash course in manners." - Groucho Marx: "I wouldn't want to be part of any photo that would have me." - Billy Crystal: "He went from photo bomber to roadkill in record time." - Jackie Mason: "Only in Paris does a pigeon have better timing than a Swiss watch." - Adam Sandler: "That's what you get for being a jerk-splat and splat!" - Jon Stewart: "In today's news: Man learns the hard way that karma is a... well, you know." 📷 The Aftermath Despite the disruption, O'Reilly managed to capture stunning shots of the couple, later editing out the obstinate man using Photoshop's Generative Fill tool. The incident has since gone viral, sparking debates about public space etiquette and the consequences of rudeness. 📝 Final Thoughts In a city renowned for its art, culture, and occasional haughtiness, this incident serves as a humorous reminder that a little courtesy goes a long way-and that sometimes, life has a funny way of delivering justice. Disclaimer: This satirical piece is a collaborative effort between a tenured philosophy professor and a dairy farmer with a penchant for storytelling. No AI was harmed or involved in its creation. The Unmovable Parisian -- 🗼 French Asshole Hit by a Bus After Refusing to Move for Wedding Photo at the Louvre https://bohiney.com/french-asshole-hit-by-a-bus/