Meta Ends Fact-Checking Program

Meta Ends Fact-Checking Program, Declares ‘Let the Lies Fly Free!’

By Lola Flake, Reporter for Wild Wires Weekly

Meta, the tech behemoth formerly known as Facebook, has decided that its experiment with fact-checking has run its course. Instead of policing misinformation, the company is now leaning into the chaos with a bold new approach: “Let the Lies Fly Free!” The announcement sent shockwaves through the digital world, but not because anyone thought Meta was doing a great job at fact-checking in the first place. Let’s face it: their accuracy standards were already somewhere between weather forecasts and your mom’s chain emails.

It’s not a fact-checking program; it’s a fact-adjacent guessing game. — Donald J. Trump

From Fact-Checking to Fiction-Enabling

Meta claims the decision is about fostering “freedom of expression.” Critics say it’s about reducing costs and avoiding legal battles. But who needs facts when you’ve got Karen from Facebook confidently proclaiming, “Vaccines turn frogs into Uber drivers”? Why limit the conversation when a single meme can spark an entire flat-earth convention?

The internet is already a Wild West of conspiracy theories, but this move turns Meta into a lawless saloon where the bartender hands out moonshine labeled “100% organic truth.” A former Meta employee, speaking under anonymity, said, “We tried fact-checking, but the lies were reproducing faster than we could squash them. It was like Whac-A-Mole but with memes about 5G causing bad vibes.”

Meta’s New Motto: “YOLO” for Facts

Ending fact-checking is essentially Meta shouting, “YOLO!” and throwing truth out the window. Mark Zuckerberg himself addressed critics during a live-streamed Q&A in the Metaverse. He appeared as his avatar, a disturbingly realistic yet somehow soulless rendition of a human being, and said, “Who are we to decide what’s real? I mean, look at the Metaverse—it’s all made up!” That statement alone should have been fact-checked, but alas, it’s too late now.

“Meta ending fact-checking? That’s like a lifeguard quitting mid-shift because ‘the water seems fine to me,’” quipped Jerry Seinfeld during a recent comedy show. He’s not wrong—fact-checking is supposed to be the lifeguard of the internet pool. Without it, we’re just cannonballing into a murky abyss of “alternative truths.”

Experts Weigh In

Experts have mixed feelings about Meta’s new approach. Professor Diana Real, an expert in media ethics, explained, “Meta’s decision reflects a broader cultural trend: people prefer stories that confirm their biases over ones that challenge them. It’s cognitive comfort food, but with the nutritional value of a deep-fried Oreo.”

Another expert, Dr. Al Truthington, chimed in: “This isn’t freedom of expression—it’s an all-you-can-eat buffet of BS. The internet was already bad at separating fact from fiction; now it’s like trying to separate spaghetti from marinara sauce with your hands.”

Lies, Lies Everywhere

Since Meta’s announcement, users have wasted no time embracing the new normal. Posts proclaiming the moon landing was filmed in a Hollywood basement are thriving. One viral post confidently stated, “The government is hiding jetpacks in Area 51, and they’re powered by kale.” The post was shared 30,000 times, mostly by users in kale-rich states like California.

Even the memes have reached new levels of absurdity. One features a picture of Bigfoot holding an iPhone with the caption: “Proof that Bigfoot was the original influencer.” Another popular meme claims cats were spies for ancient Egypt and are still “on the payroll.” Without fact-checking, these posts are spreading like wildfire, or as Meta might call it, “organic engagement.”

Comedians Join the Commentary

Comedians have had a field day with Meta’s decision.

“Now Facebook is a buffet where the main course is lies, and dessert is paranoia,” joked Ron White during a recent set.

Amy Schumer added her take: “It’s a bold move: ‘We gave up on truth so you could thrive in your delusions!’”

Even Larry David weighed in, saying, “If Meta were a babysitter, they’d leave the kids home alone with a pack of Red Bull and some fireworks.”

These quips highlight the absurdity of Meta’s move. If comedy is truth wrapped in a joke, then Meta is the opposite: a joke wrapped in truth that’s been shoved out of an airlock.

Public Opinion: A Divided Mess

A recent survey showed that 42% of Meta users are excited about the change, 35% are concerned, and the remaining 23% are too busy arguing over whether pineapple belongs on pizza to care.

One user, Sheila from Florida, said, “Finally! I can share my theories about mermaids without some nerd fact-checking me!” Sheila’s posts have already gone viral, with her claim that mermaids are “just dolphins in wigs” sparking a heated debate.

On the flip side, Tim from Ohio lamented, “This is a disaster. My uncle already thinks the earth is flat and that birds are government drones. Now he’s got likes to prove it!”

The Domino Effect

Meta’s decision may have ripple effects across the internet. Twitter, TikTok, and even Pinterest could follow suit, turning the web into a surrealist playground. Imagine a future where Pinterest boards feature recipes for “chemtrail pie” and DIY projects to build your own time machine out of popsicle sticks.

“When lies fly free, it’s like pigeons in New York: everywhere, messy, and impossible to clean up,” remarked Billy Crystal during a late-night appearance.

If the lies continue to pile up, we may need a new version of the Internet: Web 4.0, where every post is tagged with “Read at Your Own Risk.”

‘Helpful Content’ for Navigating the Chaos

Pro Tips for Surviving Meta’s Truth-Free Zone:

Invest in a Bullsh*t Detector App: These are now essential, like antivirus software but for your brain.
Cross-Check Everything: If you see a post claiming the moon is made of cheese, Google it before you start planning a cheese-themed space mission.
Develop Skeptical Reflexes: If a meme says, “97% of scientists agree Bigfoot is real,” ask which 97%—the ones at the Bigfoot Institute?
Avoid Arguments with Conspiracy Theorists: It’s like trying to teach calculus to a cat.
Laugh More: Because sometimes, the only way to cope with absurdity is to find the humor in it.

The Disclaimer

This article is a collaboration between two sentient beings—a 80-year-old muckety-muck with tenure and a 20-year-old philosophy-major-turned-dairy-farmer—who know how to spot a joke and milk it for laughs. No fact-checkers were harmed in the making of this satire. If you believe any of this is serious, well… you might just be the audience Meta was looking for.