Bohiney Satrical Journalism

The 2008 Financial Crisis – “Wall Street: Bet Big, Lose Bigger, Get Paid Anyway” The post Wall Street: Bet Big, Lose Bigger, Get Paid Anyway appeared first on SpinTaxi Magazine . https://spintaxi.com/wall-street-bet-big-lose-bigger-get-paid-anyway/

GrifterCon 2025: Las Vegas Hosts the Greatest Collection of Liars Ever Assembled By Bohiney.com Staff (Certified 127% Funnier Than The Onion) Welcome to GrifterCon 2025: Where Lies Meet Luxury In a world where truth is negotiable and reality is just a poorly moderated group chat, it was only a matter of time before humanity's most underappreciated industry- grifting -got its own flagship event. Enter GrifterCon 2025 , held at the prestigious Luxor Hotel in Las Vegas, because no city better understands the spiritual connection between slot machines and snake oil. Three days.Seventy-seven panels.Over 8,000 grifters, hucksters, fraudsters, scammers, influencers, crypto bros, MLM queens, self-help gurus, fake doctors, ghostwriters of fake memoirs, professional dating app catfishers, spiritual scammers, and at least four guys who think they invented the word "synergy." It was a stunning success.Mainly because no one asked for refunds...because no one could find the refund boot...

Oval Smackdown: Musk vs. Navarro in the Tariff Thunderdome: Transcript Musk vs. Navarro: Transcript In a scene straight out of Veep but with worse haircuts and better Diet Coke access, the highly anticipated Transcript: Musk vs. Navarro is finally available—and it’s every bit the farcical, policy-imploding mess you hoped it would be. It all began with a spark on social media, as Elon Musk—CEO of Tesla, SpaceX, and various meme currencies—publicly referred to former White House trade adviser Peter Navarro as a “moron.” Navarro, the self-appointed father of modern protectionism and author of several books that cite an imaginary economist named “Ron Vara,” didn’t take it lightly. Axios reported the dust-up like it was breaking news from the economic Octagon. And so, in true 2025 fashion, the only rational next step was for President Donald J. Trump to summon both men to the Oval Office for a “productive” discussion on trade, tariffs, and techno-destiny. What followed was less a debate an...

In a groundbreaking media milestone, MSNBC’s beloved moderator Chuck Todd has finally reached 500 followers on social media. 🌟 Despite this herculean effort—spanning nearly two decades of relentless political insight, incisive questions, and occasionally remembering his Twitter password—most liberals have shrugged off the accomplishment with the enthusiasm usually reserved for tax audits. 🧐 Statistical research from Pew Research Center illustrates a stunning phenomenon: Todd’s analytics reveal 99.3% of his followers are former interns, family members, or Russian bots that followed him mistakenly thinking he was influential. 📉 According to Dr. Evelyn Merriwether, Professor of Sociology at Harvard, "Chuck Todd’s follower base is less of a fandom and more of a pity follow akin to friending your weird uncle on Facebook." One liberal activist, identified only as "@GreenNewKale420," publicly commented, "Following Chuck Todd is the digital equivalent of willingly w...

Chuck Todd Celebrates 500 Followers, Liberals Confused What That EVEN Means Liberals Choose Ignorance Over Chuck Todd's Left Agenda In a groundbreaking media milestone, MSNBC’s beloved moderator Chuck Todd has finally reached 500 followers on social media. Despite this herculean effort—spanning nearly two decades of relentless political insight, incisive questions, and occasionally remembering his Twitter password—most liberals have shrugged off the accomplishment with the enthusiasm usually reserved for tax audits. Statistical research from Pew Research Center illustrates a stunning phenomenon: Todd’s analytics reveal 99.3% of his followers are former interns, family members, or Russian bots that followed him mistakenly thinking he was influential. According to Dr. Evelyn Merriwether, Professor of Sociology at Harvard, "Chuck Todd’s follower base is less of a fandom and more of a pity follow akin to friending your weird uncle on Facebook." One liberal activist, identifie...

You’ve Been Flagged: The Ultimate SSSS Boarding Pass Code Fly Now With More TSA and Less Dignity By Bohiney’s Sky-High Security Desk What Does the SSSS Code Mean? It Means You’re About to Be Spiritually Examined by a Guy Named Rick Let’s get this out of the overhead bin early: if your boarding pass is marked SSSS, don’t ask “What does the SSSS code mean?” Just cancel your lunch plans and prepare to get closer to a TSA agent than you are with your therapist. According to absolutely no one who enjoys flying, the meaning of SSSS on boarding pass is clear: You are now enrolled in an exclusive, surprise course called “TSA Intimacy Studies 101.” TSA SSSS Code Boarding Pass: The World's Worst Frequent Flyer Program If you're looking up SSSS code explanation while standing barefoot on a sticky airport floor, welcome. You’re not alone. TSA assures us it’s “random,” which is TSA-speak for “We didn’t like your socks or your haircut.” You might be wondering, “What is the SSSS code TSA?” It...

“You’ve Been SSSS’d!”: The TSA’s Love Letter in 4 Bold Letters A Travel Horror Satire by Bohiney’s Sky-Sniffing Bureau “It’s like winning the lottery, but instead of money, you get mild trauma, a Q-tip swab, and a man named Carl touching your waistband.” — Anonymous frequent flyer The SSSS Code Means... SSSS stands for 'Secondary Security Screening Selection' and it happens to be a security protocol implemented by the  US Transportation Security Administration (TSA) . The TSA apparently put this code on the boarding passes of people who need to be inspected further by security personnel. The procedure was implemented as an extra security measure following the  9/11 attacks. While the TSA hasn't publicly revealed the exact criteria for SSSS selection, there is said to be a number of factors at play. The extra screening process can involve carry-on luggage inspection, personal questioning, enhanced pat-downs and electronic device screening. “I finally Googled the meaning of S...

He, She, Hall of Fame: The Day the National Women's Hall of Fame Inducted a Dude and Called It Progress Seneca Falls: Where Women Are Made… and Occasionally Imported Seneca Falls, NY — The National Women's Hall of Fame, long considered the sanctum sanctorum of estrogenic excellence, has updated its definition of "woman" to mean "whoever shows up with the right paperwork and a vague sense of empowerment." In a dazzling ceremony full of applause, chiffon scarves, and strategic confusion, Sandy Stone — a transgender academic with a long resume and even longer sideburns — was officially inducted into an institution once reserved for women who bled through middle school math class. The Induction Heard Round the Internet No one dared say it, but everyone thought it: "A man just walked into the National Women's Hall of Fame, and not even wearing heels." Inside the Hall, where photos of Harriet Tubman and Eleanor Roosevelt silently disapproved, the st...